Ah, the new year is here, readers! Doesn’t it kind of smell nice? The smell of hope, the smell of the unknown… of the endless possibilities ahead of us.
It smells a little bit like farts, though. It makes sense, because let’s face it, in the words of Forrest Gump, life is like a fart – you never know what you’re going to get.
Sometimes, life can be really loud and funny. We are surrounded by friends and people we care about, who fill our lives with laughter and tears even when the fumes reach our core. Life is unexpected, sudden, it makes its appearance with a bang, and it somehow doesn’t bother us.
Sometimes, though, life just stinks. It doesn’t even have to be loud; when life is quiet, it’s often when it lingers the most. But there’s no stench so nasty that will last forever, and no smell so strong that it can’t be waved off with your hand, like it doesn’t matter. It’s the same with life, no problem is too difficult that it can’t be dealt with.
Our choices take us where we are, like when you fart in the shower, which is one of the stupidest things you can do, since you are confined to a small space where you rot and suffocate with your own stench. Or like when you eat Teriyaki sauce and that’s what life smells like the next day.
But it’s not just that, there’s also a dash of luck, involved. If you’re lucky, the fart will go unnoticed by the board of directors. If you’re not, you’ll manage to avoid the raspberry but then your belly’s growls will give you away.
Anyway, I guess the point is that life is unpredictable, and crazy, and sometimes gruesome. But it’s up to us to take it the right way and not let the downs mess up the goods. Just like farts! It’s up to us to laugh at the sound of air flowing through half opened buttcheeks, instead of frowning and grimacing at the smell.
And that’s why we celebrate the new years that come our way. It’s a reminder, that time goes on, but we have the power to make the moments timeless.
And that is indeed how I begin this year of blogging, with a classy post about farts. Happy 2013, readers!
Gahndi once said a similar thing, I believe.
He wasn’t half so eloquent.